Eight days short of three years

At literally every stage of Ella's life I've thought I could not love that stage or her more. But somehow she continues to get more and more fun and being a mother somehow becomes more and more rewarding. I remember holding her as a newborn wondering what kind of a toddler she would be and what talking to her would be like. The reality of a conversation seemed so distant but now we have conversations. Real conversations. In the car, at home, constantly. About what her day was like, things she would like to do, things that make her happy, the possibilities are endless. She is becoming a person, a person with her own opinions, emotions, and thoughts and I am becoming a mother to a little kid.

It is crazy to me that Ella will be starting school at the end of August. We decided on the Children's Meeting House Montessori School and she was accepted. I got an email this week regarding completing her school paperwork, physical, and school supplies. SCHOOL SUPPLIES?! WHAT!? My baby needs school supplies already? I am so excited for her to begin this journey yet want to cry at the same time

(she learned to cross her eyes LOL)

She is truly the kindest, sweetest little girl. She is my greatest achievement thus far in my life and I like to think that we are doing something right with her. I worry about school. I see how much she loves kids, how much she wants friends, how nice she is to them. What happens when someone is mean to her and Im not there to protect her. What happens when she gets her heartbroken or someones words destroy her spirit? Ill always be here for a safe place to land yet am I strong enough to try to repair the heartbreak when she comes home from the first time she understands what teasing is or a boy breaks her heart.



I've worried about adding a member to our family. Will Ella feel left out? Will she continue to know just how much we love her? I still carry these worries and think I always will yet lately I am so excited for Ella. She will be an amazing big sister and an even better role model.

We’re chipping away at two. In just a week she will be three years old.  I don’t know how we got here, but I know it will be gone before we know it. These months and years are going too fast. There are no bottles to put it in, no way to stop it and all I can do at this point is hope to not constantly be doing that thing where you’re crying while maniacally laughing because you can’t decide which emotion is greater. I’m so sad and I’m so happy. It’s so painful. And it’s so awesome.

Due date with nothing arriving

Today is my due date. I wish I could tell you I am in labor, but I am not. I assumed this little one would be here by now. I've been carrying her around for 40 weeks now and clearly my uterus is a nice and comfy place to hang out. Well sorry baby but I am issuing you your eviction notice as of today

I really would not feel all that bad if I were getting sleep and not still working. The only thing that makes me feel better is I keep progressing in both dilation, effacement, and other signs my body is showing. At this point I have literallly tried every trick in the book (aside from castor oil) to get this little one out. She has made it very clear that she is staying in there til she is good and ready. Or until the OB's/midwives force me to pick an induction date next week.

Still pregnant

I again cannot get a video from our phone to turn the right way but wanted to share this and you get the point none the less. If you have at all listened to the radio recently you have come across the most annoying song, Call Me Maybe. Ella knows the words to literally about every pop song currently on the radio. Below you can see her singing part of Call Me Maybe....

The other day she was humming the song Tongue Tied by GroupLove note for note. I had not a clue that she knew the word humming so I said wow you are really good at singing words song for song. She replies "Mama I am not singing the words, I am humming the song".

Ella is also so excited about her birthday coming up. It is literally all she talks about lately. This past weekend she just kept holding up two fingers saying "my birthday is in two weeks"

As for a baby update, as of today I am 3cm and 60% effaced. The OB stripped my membranes today and if it is going 
put you into labor it typically will in 24 to 48 hours. She thinks I will go on my own before needing to be induced.
I have an appt scheduled Monday in case I do not. They will do an ultrasound to check fluids, check the placenta, size
of baby etc. She stated she does not like to see people go more than a week over due and therefore if I have not delivered
by Monday they would like me to pick a date late next week/early the following week to be induced. Ugh, please
baby I know you are comfortable in there but please come out on your own very soon!

Visit from a friend but not the baby

Mandy came for an overnight visit on Saturday night. As you can see she was a huge hit with both Ella and Winston and neither of them would leave her alone! Luckily Mandy is a great sport and entertained both Ella and Winston

In case you are wondering, yes I am still pregnant and unfortunately feeling fine. Just got back from a walk with the dog. Hoping its any minute of any day at this point

39 weeks

I've finally reached the point where I am ready for this baby to come. While Im still feeling fairly well over all, I can feel myself starting to slow down and become a bit more irritable. I also haven't been sleeping very well. This past Friday I had awful cramps and last night I was suddenly super uncomfortable. I keep thinking this is it but so far Im still pregnant.
At my check up this week I was 2 cm dilated and 50% effaced so at least Im making progress. We are also getting very anxious to meet this little one. We have narrowed it down to three names, first and middle, and will decide when we see her face.

I am really hoping to not get induced. I know I wouldn't want to go too far over my due date which can cause a bigger baby and therefore more difficult labor and increased chance of c section. Also your risk of having a stillborn baby increases as well as the baby passing meconium in the womb. At the same time I am hoping this baby comes before or slightly after my due date as I am still really preparing for an unmedicated birth. Induction increases the chance of using some type of pain blocker due to natural endorphins not being released due to artificial induction. Also Pitocin causes contractions to peak and become stronger much quicker than naturally occurring 
therefore w increased chance of needing medication. I am also hoping to not need constant fetal monitoring so I can 
get up and move around which if induced you typically need constant monitoring. 


So I have been trying more natural remedies and methods to get things moving. 

Like I mentioned in an earlier post, I have been taking Evening Primrose Oil since 37 weeks. It is to help ripen the cervix, 
not induce labor. Also, even if you end up having to get induced, it is supposed to assist in a quicker, easier labor.
I started Organic Raspberry LEAF tea last week. I wish I would have started it earlier. Again, the purpose is 
not to induce labor but rather to strengthen the uterus for an easier, shorter labor as well as more productive contractions
once in labor. It has been used for years by Midwives and Native Americans.
I have also tried walking, eggplant, pineapple, mango, spicy food, basil, sex, and Im sure I am forgetting a few others. 
I have my next apt with the OB on Tuesday and am hoping this baby comes on her own at some point this week.
I was really hoping I would not have to go back to work this week but unless something happens tonight, it looks
like that's where Ill be heading at 615 am. Blah

Wordless Wednesday

First Haircut

Ever since I got my haircut a couple weeks ago, Ella has been asking for one. Yesterday I decided I would finally take her to finally get her first haircut.

We went to Cookie Cutters and Ella picked the pink car to sit in.

As every single station had a tv the lady kept asking what TV show Ella would like to watch. I kept assuring her Ella is not much of TV kid and would do just fine without it. The lady insisted on having the TV on. Fine, whatever, Ella didn't even so much as glance at it. The lady herself was not very friendly and didn't even talk to Ella which I find to be very bizarre considering she works at a child's salon.

 

Ella did not move a muscle the entire haircut! She did awesome! We only trimmed about a 1/2 inch  so the cut was quick. Considering the lady was not much of a talker and had 0 personality, Id like to see how she does with all the kids who squirm, scream, and cry during hair cuts.

Haircut all finished and Ella being goofy

I liked that they saved some of the hair and put it in a little baggie

Of course I had to go straight home and document it in the baby book.

Painting Palette

Our neighbors are out of town and so we have been watering their flowers. Last night we went over and Ella played on their swing set. Tonight she wanted to as well but with the heat and my cramps we decided against it. So I had to come up with a fun, distracting activity. We opted for some water painting on the bathtub before bath time. 

She started painting black stripes on her legs and declared herself a zebra :)

And here's a bare belly shot at 38 weeks. No that is not a stretch mark, it's an old scar from a surgery. I have been lucky enough to not get any stretch marks again this pregnancy! yay!

And bath time was not complete without a towel on the head pic. How can you not love that face?

38 weeks

I cannot believe that in less than a month I will have a three year old and in less than a month we will have another little girl joining our family. While it seems like Ella has always been a part of our lives, I remember her birth like yesterday. I cannot believe how the time flies by. It makes me a bit sad that this pregnancy is coming to a close because before I know it I will be sitting here with the new baby about to turn three, Ella about to turn six, and time marching on.

I'm still trucking along and not allowing pregnancy or the heat to slow me down in the slightest. I did have a bit of a hiccup on Tuesday morning. I got to work and after about an hour of being there got so dizzy I couldn't walk, my pulse was racing, I was sweating and nauseous. No matter what I did (including laying on my office floor) it wouldn't let up. My boss and I went to the dr office next door and had them take my blood pressure and it was 144 over 80. My BP is normally around 100 over 60. At this point I was completely convinced I had developed pre eclampsia. I had Tom come pick me up and I phoned the OB. I was already scheduled for later that day for my weekly visit and a non stress test. The OB advised I rest, drink lots of water, and come in as scheduled. When I went in my BP had dropped and the non stress test the baby looked absolutely amazing according to it.

All those up and down bumps are the baby moving and the heart rate going up when she moves, exactly what they want to see.

The OB assured that the baby was fine and he felt everything was okay. The baby is head down and has dropped into my pelvis and Im scheduled to go back next week. In the 38 weeks I have been pregnant I have only gained a total of 18 pounds, perfect!  I took a total of four and half hours worth of naps that day drank tons of water and felt much much better by that evening.

Tom is beginning to freak out the closer I get because he has his summer finals next Wednesday. We are both hoping that I can at least hold off for one more week. But I hate to say that Im having lots of cramping tonight so we will see where this leads. Sleep has also become increasingly difficult and I have to say that last night was the worst night sleep Ive had in years. Other than that though I am feeling amazingly well. Like Ive said before, I am clearly blessed with uneventful pregnancies. The swelling has even gone down since I've increased my water intake again.

I started taking evening primrose oil last week. It's an herb that many midwives recommend. I took it with my last pregnancy as well. You typically start it around 36 or 37 weeks and can take it both orally and vaginally. It DOES NOT start labor. It is meant to ripen and soften the cervix so that a natural, unmedicated labor is more realistic. Therefore, even if you have to get induced by your water being broken for going over, youre more likely to not need pitocin and to go ahead and go into labor naturally.

I'm not sure how much I've talked about it but my goal is to have a natural, unmedicated labor and delivery. I have researched it, talked to my midwife, visualized it, prepared Tom and discussed it with him, and created a very thorough birth plan which Ive included below. People have asked why in the world would I want to go unmedicated. I felt like I got talked into an epidural after laboring with Ella for over 9 hours. I ended up letting the epidural wear off by the time I delivered and essential delivered unmedicated but at the same time not really. Giving birth to Ella has been by far the most amazing experience of my life. I was on a complete labor high. I still envy people in labor. It was the most proud Ive ever been in myself, Ive never felt more accomplished. It's the most incredible and exciting time of your life. So why wouldn't I want to fully experience that? Beyond that it is ultimately safer for the mother and child and you are less likely to have complications and more likely to fully bond with your child and it encourages milk production and breastfeeding. It can often lead to less pain in the long run due to complications from medications or c section due to labor not progressing as it should when taking medications. Ultimately its a personal decision and a personal quest.



MY BIRTH PLAN:

Prior to active labor:                                                                     

·         I would like to discuss laboring at home as long as possible.            

·         If I go past my due date and the baby and I are fine, I prefer to go into labor naturally rather than be induced with closer monitoring of the baby.

·         If induction becomes necessary, I would like to try natural induction techniques first (with the guidance of my practitioner).

·         These are the natural induction techniques I would like to try:

1.      Breast stimulation

2.      Walking

3.      Sexual intercourse

4.      Evening Primrose Oil

5.      Raspberry Tea

·         If Medical induction becomes necessary, I prefer to try:

1.      Stripping membranes

2.      Rupturing membranes

Upon arrival at the hospital: I AM  PREPARING FOR AN UNMEDICATED LABOR, I HOPE TO HAVE A NURSE WHO SUPPORTS AND BELIEVES IN THIS TYPE OF LABOR

·         I prefer to have my support partner with me at all times, Tom Gazinski

·         I trust that my practitioner will seek out my opinion concerning all of the issues directly affecting my birth before deviating from my plan.

·         I prefer to give birth in a birthing room.

·         I would like a midwife present if possible

·         I would like to attempt to deliver in positions other than lying flat on back (lithotomy position)

·         If birth equipment is available, I would like to use:

1.      A birthing tub/pool/shower.

2.      A birthing stool.

3.      A squatting bar.

4.      A birthing ball

·         I would like to have small amounts of food if hungry and liquids if thirsty during labor

·         I request staff NOT offer pain medication unless I request it

·         I am prepared to try to handle pain with these natural and alternative methods:

1.      Breathing techniques.

2.      Distraction techniques.

3.      Massage.

4.      Deep (or guided) relaxation.

5.      Water/bath/shower.

6.      Hot/cold therapy

·         Other considerations :

1.      Ultimately, I want to be able to walk around and move as I wish while in labor.

2.      Ultimately, I want to feel unrestricted in delivery positions

·         I would like to be encouraged to try the following different positions for labor:

1.      Whatever feels right at the time

·         I would like to push instinctively when I have the urge. Coaching would be appreciated during crowing to help reduce the likelihood of perineal tearing.

·         To help prevent tearing, please apply:

1.       Hot compresses.

2.      Oil.

3.      Perineal massage.

·         Please use local anesthetic for repairs

·         If intervention is needed for an assisted vaginal birth, please discuss benefits of forceps vs vacuum delivery 

·         Please delay cord clamping if possible

·         I would like my husband to cut the cord

·         I would like to avoid Pitocin to deliver the placenta unless medically necessary

Following Delivery

·         If no complications, I would like the baby placed on my chest immediately.

·         I would like as much time as possible to bond with baby before procedures are completed

·         I would like all newborn routine procedures to be performed in my presence.

·         I would like the eye drops to be administered following bonding time and the vitamin K to be given orally if possible and during bonding time

·         My baby is to be exclusively breastfed.  I would like to try to breastfeed as soon as possible following delivery. Please do not offer any formula or artificial nipples unless medically necessary. Please do not offer sugar water.

·         I would like to see a lactation consultant as soon as possible for further recommendations and guidance.

·         Please bathe my baby after we have had time to bond with her

·         If the baby has any complications, I would like my partner to be present with the baby at all times, if possible. I would also like to be transported with baby if possible

I would like my in-hospital routine to be:

·         I do not want the baby to be taken from our room or taken to the nursery at any time unless medically necessary

·         I prefer a private room.                                                                                    

·         I prefer to have my partner stay with me for the duration of my hospital stay.

If a C-Section is not an emergency, please give us time alone to think about it before asking for our written consent.

·         Please discuss anesthesia options with me

·         I prefer low transverse incision

·         I would like the baby to be shown to me immediately after she’s born.

·         I would like to sign any waivers necessary to permit me to be with my baby in recovery.

·         As long as my baby is healthy, I would like my partner to be the baby’s constant source of attention until I am free to bond with it (i.e., holding, skin-to-skin contact, etc.).

·         Please pay special attention to our nursing needs in recovery. I may need some extra help nursing after the operation.

·         Please discuss with me what I can expect to feel immediately following the procedure.

·         Please discuss my post-operative pain medication options with me before or immediately following the procedure.

Happy 4th!

Happy 4th everyone! It was so nice to have a day off for the three of us to be together.
This morning we walked to the pool for a few hours. The water felt amazing in all this heat.

We had promised Ella we would keep her up for fireworks for weeks now. That is until we realized most of the firework shows are tonight. We both have work tomorrow so decided against it. We also considered one of the many festivals but decided the pool and AC at home were much more appealing. So after nap we at least went and got Ella some sparklers. I saw online this cool way to use a cup to keep the sparks and fire away from their hand. Below is Tom demonstrating a sparkler to Ella.



While Tom grilled us some tasty burgers for dinner, Ella cooled off with a popsicle.

Hope everyone had a safe and fun 4th and stayed cool!